Spell-bound II

In the first installment of the list of creative spellings, i had furnished some examples of words (mis)spelt creatively. Here is another list of some more gems – amusing neologism - in the series. This is a new way of neology- introduction of new words!

As observed in the first list, small roadside eateries are veterans in this area. ‘Rice & Fish Carry’, ‘Bread & Hamlet Sand Wiches’, ‘Silly Chicken’, ‘Pride Rice’, ‘Fresh Muchrooms’, ‘Fresh Garbage & Carat from Ooty’, ‘Ice Scream’, ‘Col Drinks’, ‘Diary Products’, and ‘Chicken Thai Roast’ (chicken thigh roast), are some more bloomers in the series.

As seen earlier, messages painted on the rear of trucks are another source of such amusing mutilations. The very strange Family Planning message ‘We two, our won’ is one more example. The message on another lorry was 'Use Diaper At Night'! The signboard on a highway informs, ‘Petrol Bump Ahead’ -- there was actually a bump in the form of a speed breaker a few meters away! An Electricity Board’s transformer sports a prominent red alert, ‘DANCER’. The venue of meeting of a Lions Club has a signboard near the entrance saying ‘Loins Club’! Another signboard informs the reader about the presence of a ‘Shopping Maul’! The advertisement of a newly opened Marriage Hall informs ‘Cheating Capacity – 200 Persons’. A public convenience is labeled ‘TOLET’. Some days ago, I had seen that on a board painted with the words 'TO LET’, the letter ’I’ had been scratched by hand to make it ‘TOILET’!

A gym has a signboard saying ‘Atlas Buddy Building Gym’. A banner once wished ‘A Marry Christmas’ to its readers. A self-proclaimed English-Teaching Institute carries a sign ‘Learn English in 60 Hovers’. A sign at a traffic intersection reads : Obey traffic rools. !!!

Printer’s devil also contributes a lot to this. A newspaper, carrying news about honouring an Army General referred to him as, ‘Battle-scared General’. When the unintended but irate victim telephoned and blasted the Editor, a correction appeared in the paper the next day saying, ‘Bottle-scarred General’! Imagine the reaction of the General this time!!!

As i have said earlier, some of the messages on the rear of lorries make hilarious reading. But the message, 'Buri nazar wale, Tera muhan kala' has not forsaken politeness; 'wala' in the first part would have well-rhymed with 'kala' in the second part. Politeness has dictated the respectable 'wale'! Urdu language is known for its polite words. To ask someone to 'get out', it uses 'Tasrif le jayiye' (Take away your honour.)!

Another common message 'Mera Bharat Mahaan' on the rear of lorries is obviously meant to convey the owner's patriotism. Recently, I saw a modified, tongue-in-cheek, version of it. The message read, "Sau mein nabe beiman; phir bhi mera Bharat mahaan". :)))))) By the way, when motherland is like mother, why is it not, 'MERI Bharat Mahaan'?

I came across a new word ‘mango-man’ coined in India recently. The origin is 'Aam Aadmi’ in the series of advertisements titled ‘Aam Aadmi Ko Kya Mila?’ (What did the common man get?) released by the Congress Party prior to the General Elections of 2004. During the rule of National Democratic Alliance led by Bharatiya Janata Party from 1999 to 2004, the Economic Growth Rate was good but inflation was high (When is it not so?). The Growth Rate of Gross Domestic Product was high but prices of some items used by the common man was also high. BJP released a series of advertisements titled ‘India Shining’, highlighting its achievements. To counter this, Congress Party’s advertisements bore the title ‘Aam Aadmi Ko Kya Mila?’, highlighted the difficulties faced by the common man (‘aam aadmi’) during the NDA rule. The term has caught on and the Hindi term 'Aam Aadmi' has been literally translated to ‘Mango Man'!

We know the word ‘postpone’. Its opposite is ‘advance’, not ‘prepone’. ‘Pone’ is not an independent word to which ‘post’ or ‘pre’ can prefixed. ‘Postpone’ is a single word, not a compound word. However, nowadays, ‘prepone’ is used by many, to mean its opposite, so much so that even some dictionaries have reluctantly accepted it! Another word by common mistakes is 'normalcy' as the noun form of the adjective 'normal'. The correct word is 'normality' but purists like me apprehend that one day 'normalcy' will become the accepted word:((((

I find that the term 'one of the world's ' is used by many and even by respected newspapers in an incorrect way and in what is called in Grammar an ambiguous way. For example it is said, "India in one of the world's most populous countries." It implies that there many worlds and one wonders to ask, 'How many worlds are there?' The correct expression would be, "India is world's one of the most populous countries." Is it not better and does it not remove the ambiguity?

And now, a word about Hinglish, a hilarious combination of Hindi and English words. In this, the pride of place is occupied by what once Rajiv Gandhi said during his address at an election rally, “Hum jitenge yaa losenge….” etc. By the way, Rajiv Gandhi’s favourite reply, when anyone brought a problem to him was, “Hum dekhenge" (We will see). When the frequency of this reply increased, a listener sitting in one of the back seats once muttered in a low voice, “Humne dekha hai; hum dekh rahe hain; hum dekhte rahenge.”

TAIL PIECE

One person said to another, “I talked to her two hours after she died.” Observing the look of consternation in the eyes of the listener, the first person clarified, “I talked to her. Two hours after, she died.”

TAIL PIECE II

The title of an Odia movie made in 2012 is 'I D I O T '. The expansion of the term given below the title is: I Do Ishq Only Tumse. This strange mixture of English and Hindi words in the title of an Odia movie means in proper English is 'I Love Only You'. A theatre of the absurd?